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Thursday, December 31, 2015

The Year of Firsts

So it's the end of yet another year... I can't believe it's flown by so quickly. It seems I should be standing back in December of 2014 instead of having raced to the end of this one. But instead I'm sitting on a stool at the kitchen island listening to my family recounting their favorite memories of 2015. It's December 31st  - which means it's time to write the traditional year end summary post. The tradition started with this blog's first post. I wanted to start a blog and I didn't want to do it on New Year's Day.

There are tons of ways to sum up a year and there are myriads of memories that make up the sum of a year. Generally though I try to sum up each year with a word. Just one word. 2013 was steady or routinely exciting or maybe just simply great (even if I didn't always know it haha). 2014 was transitions. And this year... well, I struggled more trying to figure out a word for this year than others. At first I thought of the year of goodbyes. It started optimistically enough. After a year of transitions, I waited reservedly enthusiastic the last night of 2014 to welcome the new year in. The year was initiated with the death of my great uncle. It continued with one after goodbye. I broke up with a boyfriend, ministry opportunities that had opened up while I was in school closed or tapered off, positions shifted. Within the last few days I was scheduled for "retirement" from an writing forum. It was the first place where I learned what it means to be passionate about a people group. I discovered I love teens, especially Christian ones that feel like they need to keep their life together but are falling apart at the seams internally. Another organization I had a lot of dealings with in college I just learned today has been dissolved. There were a lot of times this year where forks in the road were reached and travel companions' maps directed them to turn off at a different junction from me. The Master Mapmaker has a unique plan for each person. Some goodbyes, like breaking up or shifting positions, I don't regret because I knew they were the right thing to do as I was doing them but I'd be lying if I denied they didn't have pain attached to them. Others, like the writing forum, I didn't want to say at all but they had to be done.

Goodbyes bring a bit of wistfulness but I don't regret a thing - my philosophy is if God is sovereign and has a plan and I'm choosing to give my life to Him, He'll make sure I don't miss His will. It's not that bad things won't happen or I'm not foolish and stupid sometimes. But I know He's in control and He arranges everything for a purpose. So no need to worry about the past or be scared of the future.

Along that lines, I don't like labeling years negatively... or anything for that matter. God is good. Always. So... I kept pondering. You know something? Every goodbye brings in a new time of life. It brings in some missing sure but it brings in something else - a new phase of life. It brings in firsts. Some firsts aren't so great of course - like moving on from the loss of a loved one. But you bring with you all the experience and wisdom those previous things gave you. You can choose to join in wholeheartedly in the next phase of life whatever that is. Sometimes it's hard. But it's worth it. God makes all things news - hearts, minds, lives. So firsts, even the hard ones, can be a good thing.

Some of this year's firsts included officially pursuing growing my business, getting my first real paycheck, sending off an article, researching more avenues for jobs in my field than I like to remember, flying internationally, visiting an island, building deeper friendships with a couple of very special people, getting real business cards (the ones I made when I was 10 or so don't count), seeing a Broadway Play, and making new friends. It was full of intangible firsts too... realization of what those big words you've thrown around all your life really mean, first understanding of what it means to let go, of what it means to pay the price, etc. Perhaps the most valuable lesson was really throwing myself into what other people were happy about... and reaping so much more happiness than I ever thought possible from it. People always made me happy. But this year I learned even more than ever how to forget whatever it is that could bring you down if you dwelt on it and immersing yourself full force into what someone else is doing. Eventually, you can be happier than them over them being happy. It's quite wonderful.

"It's a fine life." - Newsies "Carrying the Banner"

It's a very fine life. So full of love, sacrifice, strong character, strength, and grace. I'm wearing my "life is good" cap my parents bought me before I embarked on so many adventures last year. It's been everywhere I have recently - disaster zones, internships, and Cayman. I'm excited to see what the next year brings. I'm sure it'll bring lots of transitions and firsts too. I'm also sure it'll bring a lot of greatness...

Here comes "What It Means to be Loved" on Spotify. Here's to another year of learning more fully "what it means to be loved." By all of you and You Who's always watching out for me. I hope I can give it back a little.

And here's to me not getting any more mushy and going to bed. Welcome new year.

Wednesday, December 23, 2015

It's Been a Long Time

Wow! It's been awhile since the dust has been blown off this blog. It's been a busy summer... and fall... and now winter.

First there was Cayman.
Left - lovely tree lined avenue near Cabana Bay's shopping center (I could have spent an afternoon just driving around looking at scenery); right top - kayaking on the crests (one of my favorite highlights); right bottom - best gelato ever! 
Cayman... where the boulevards are lined with palm trees and the water's clear and the wind plays with your hair constantly. While we were there, my sister and I learned how to snorkel. Definitely one of my favorite things. Could have done it all day long! Fascinating shops including book stores, and a shop that sold $400 shoes (I held a pair :D). For a gluten-free foodie or a health fanatic (I fall in the former category forced to act like the latter thanks to allergies), it's sheer heavenly. There's organic veggies in all forms and varieties and fresh fruit every day. If you're really brave, there's always coconuts on the beach you can pick up and eat. I was surprised by how sour the coconut water tasted. Apparently the kind in the bottle has sugar added to it but they don't have to label it. They also have the BEST EVER gelato! 

Mural in an observatory tower where you could overlook almost the whole island. Corresponding to the rising floors, it showed the sea life from the bottom to the surface. Many of the fish depicted we saw while snorkeling. 

From June, summer seemed to speed into fall way too fast... 

September brought APEX. APEX is basically a big event where current and past CollegePlus students get together to listen to great speakers, fellowship, play games and well... chill... recharge... connect... and grow in Christ. Now to most CollegePlus students this was a huge event as it was - largest gathering of crazy people... I mean CollegePlus students ever this year. But it was somewhat bigger to me as it seemed downright impossible to make it happen. Megan and I had been scheming since last year. Or rather, she'd been scheming, I kept acting like I wasn't interested in scheming because I didn't want to get my hopes up... and then somehow it all came together faster than you can say "CPE3 APEX" and I found myself in New Braunfels, Texas. While there were many wonderful speakers and I brought home some tips to apply to my own business, the best part was simply spending time with old friends for what may be the last time we're all together in one place. We would spend the days in between sessions talking, soaking in the sun and playing our hearts out in the fun team building activities, running away from the sun by rocking while others played a myriad of sports, and ending each night with a singing session. (Seriously, we ended up calling ourselves "the old people" from our habit of all ending up in a row near the rocking chairs to catch the breeze - and shoot it - whenever there was a break. This is what college does to a person I reckon. haha) The singing sessions were especially special - to just be and listen to the music and let myself sing without being the least bit shy like I usually am. We would always end with hymns. It was just so special to end each day together with the Lord and hear the wonderful words "see you tomorrow."  
Top - all of us! :D Bottom row - pics of very awesome friends and  penguins (apparently they demonstrate principles of community very well... they are also extremely cute waddling sedately up and down the aisle). Side column - the event's logo made by a friend of mine, three of the dearest people in the world + me, spontaneous hymn singing sessions are the best, and another pic with friends before saying goodbye.
The next main event of the year was Thanksgiving - I wanted to go all out this year and do a big meal. So we did complete with turkey, homemade cranberry sauce, potato stuffing, sweet potato casserole, bacon fat in the green beans, oatmeal cookies, and pumpkin pie, etc. By the way, has anyone else ever done potato stuffing? I got it from a magazine but everyone I talked to had only heard of cornbread stuffing. It was also fun watching mom use remnants and clearance items to totally transform the dining room into a seasonal, fun, festive environment. It looked like it came out of a magazine! For me part of the fun was also just learning about and doing what so many generations of Southern women have done before - cook good food, make a beautiful presentation out of nothing, and invite family to all cluster around the table. Family is a wonderful thing. Having both sets of grandparents and a cousin around the table was so wonderful - to be all together, all enjoying.

My first pumpkin pie! (and only my second pie to ever make ;))

Next, came Newsies - "the real for true" Broadway play!!!! It was my first ever to see and it came together in a miraculous way that I still can't believe. It definitely ranks among the best birthday presents ever. The lights, the dancing, the sets, the acting - it was like nothing I could have dreamed of. And trust me... I'd been dreaming. It was something that had always been on my "dream list." However, I had no clue it would work out this year. The family road trip to and from New Orleans was fun too - an 8 hour round trip in one day. ;) We didn't see much of New Orleans, but it was cool to see the house where my grandmother grew up now that I'm older. I hadn't been since before Katrina. Also, the Saenger theater was gorgeous in its own right. It's been restored to it's original 1920's look. 



Of course, alongside all that I decided to take a chance and build/grow my business more this year. In summary, I edit anything from books to brochures, offer essay assistance, and tutor English and the Social Sciences. Mostly, I work online but I also do in person tutoring as well. Check out more here. The page needs a lot more posts. But it's a start. And business cards are a start. And getting a few paychecks is a start too ;). 

So yes, that's where I've been from May 27th to December 23rd. I'd promise to be around more... but I'd probably end up breaking it. So I'll just say, I'd like to be around more. ;)